


throw our hands overboard

by sandyk



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Bisexual Michelle Jones, Bisexual Peter Parker, F/M, Fake Dating, Ice Skating, Mistletoe, holiday party, references to past relationships, snow shenanigans!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:14:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28277445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: MJ just wants her coworkers off her back and to avoid any set ups so she says she has a boyfriend. Then the stakes get a little higher so she really needs that fake boyfriend, and there's no one! Then MJ runs into her high school ex-boyfriend Peter right outside the restaurant.
Relationships: Michelle Jones/Peter Parker
Comments: 24
Kudos: 75
Collections: Spideychelle Secret Santa - 2k20





	throw our hands overboard

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spidermanhomecomeme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spidermanhomecomeme/gifts).



> Not mine, no profit garnered. BEC I first read on the blog Ask A Manager. Title from Lorde's The Louvre. Thank you A!!

MJ liked her job fine, but it had a lot of downsides. 

Life has downsides, that's the way it goes, she knew the drill. She got to be creative and artsy, she was getting paid enough to actually afford a teeny studio in Manhattan, no one seemed to mind whatever she wanted to do with her hair. 

She stomped through the snow that was still falling to her office. She'd briefly thought about the UGG knock offs she had hidden in the back of her closet, but even steady snow couldn't make her get those out. So she was stomping in thrifted Doc Martens. Of course someone had already put up a sign right at the door of her part of the office cutely asking people to take off their wet shoes before walking on the carpet. MJ grumbled and complied. Overly cutesy sign meant Ashley had made it, and that woman was a master at white woman passive aggressive retaliation. She'd be pacing around looking at everyone to see if they did what she told them to, too. 

MJ got to her desk and unwrapped her scarf and second scarf and coat. "Hey, hey, hey," Marco said as he walked by, not looking at her. MJ thought, as she thought every day in the two years they'd been working together, that there was no way he was born with the name Marco. MJ had nothing against reinvention, but she felt like Marco was a jerk and had reinvented himself without any kind of originality. Or style. Marco just annoyed her. 

She got to work. Ashley sucked in a lot of ways, many, many ways, but she did make sure they had the creature comforts. Some sad grandkid of a richy rich asshole came by and took MJ's coffee order and twenty minutes later she had a piping hot latte. MJ drew. She had a semi specific assignment about incorporating a very specific couch, but otherwise she could do what she wanted. She really liked that part of her job. Come in and get paid to draw. 

The weather was staying steady at snowy and biting cold, so everyone ordered lunch in. MJ sat with her legs crossed in the company lunch room and had soup and a piping hot grilled cheese. Her latte was long gone so she asked about another one. Then it was in her hand. "Piping hot latte, once piping hot grilled cheese in my other hand. Good life," she said. 

Genvieve (pronounced like the French, MJ had been informed) smiled at MJ and said, "It is nice, isn't it?"

MJ smiled back, nodding. They were two happy people, eating and being quiet. 

Lyndon and Aiden came in and then actual conversation started. MJ kept out of that mess. She didn't mind people, not generally, but her father had once called MJ an acquired taste and that was definitely true. Sometimes MJ hated smoothing herself down so she didn't piss off people. But she also hated being the weirdo of the office so she just kept herself quiet. That worked, too. 

Aiden said, "Michelle, who are you bringing to the holiday party? I feel like everyone's paired off. If you don't have someone, I bet we could fix you up."

"Oh, I know someone," Genvieve said. 

Lyndon said, "Boy or girl? Or, well, who would you like? I've got someones, too."

MJ grimaced and tried to make it look like a real smile. She pretty much knew this group of people all knew someone. They knew another black person that they were going to set her up with. Because MJ and this other black person were the only black people they knew. She was being cynical. But she was definitely right. 

She lied. "No, no, I have a guy. In the past I've had girlfriends and boyfriends but right now, boyfriend. I'm bringing him. No set up needed."

"Good," Lyndon said. "Can't wait to meet him."

The company actually let them go early because the steady snow meant horrifying traffic. "Take home your remote links," Ashley said, pacing through the office. "Probably working from home tomorrow."

When MJ got home, she started flipping through her contacts. She called Ned. Ned said, "I'm not being your fake boyfriend. My wife objects." 

"I can literally hear her laughing at me, so I know she doesn't," MJ said. "Damn, I should have said I had a girlfriend, Betty would make me look good."

"You should have," Ned said. "I'm not interested in participating in your rom com plot plans."

"Fine, because I'll probably meet the love of my life from a forum post or something," she said. 

"What forum are you posting on for that?"

MJ growled. "I don't know, Ned, you were my first call."

When they went back to work three days later, Lyndon said, "I'm really glad you have someone, Michelle. For the party, I mean. I know creative types like to be quirky but it never hurts to get some nice face time with your bosses."

"Yeah, face time is always better with a boyfriend or girlfriend," MJ said, rocking a little in her sensible boots. This sounded bad. 

"Well, it just helps to show all our sides, you know?" Lyndon smiled again. He had that look like, this is a significant conversation. He was technically MJ's supervisor. He was the one who gave her significant talks. 

MJ really liked this job. She didn't want to get replaced because she wasn't being personable enough. She said, "Sounds like great advice, thanks, thanks."

She had to know someone. 

Turns out she didn't. She dressed up, did her makeup, decided to do something soft with her hair. She looked good. Really good. She had her best slinky purple dress with a very very low back. Maybe she'd find someone on the subway. 

Everyone on the subway looked like a fucking freak. She was definitely going to have sell a stupid story. She needed a name for her boyfriend. 

"Peter?" 

Unbelievably her ex-boyfriend was standing in front of the restaurant in a very nice black suit with his hands jammed in his winter jacket's pockets. He said, "MJ?"

"Michelle," she said automatically. 

Peter looked down and then back at her. "Michelle. Are you going to this party?"

"Yes, are you? You don't work, you don't work at my office," MJ said. 

"Yeah, I don't. But I do some, uh, freelance photography sometimes. So I got an invite. I didn't know you worked here. Not here, at this restaurant, I mean at --"

"Yup," MJ said. "Yes, I do. Hey, I have a horrible and stupid request, but. Ugh. Do you want to be my fake boyfriend? I'm stuck in this, I kind of need to. Ugh."

He blinked a few times. She said, "Oh, fuck, are you married? Dating someone? I feel like Ned would have told me if you were married."

Peter said, "Not married, not dating right now. I mean, I'm not seeing anyone. I date. I just, like, two weeks ago broke up with someone. One of those dump before you get dumped, frankly. I, uh, I do think you'd know if I got married, I mean, Ned told me when you were engaged. Sorry, I didn't mean to bring that up."

"Oh, no, it's fine. She was a jerk. She wasn't a jerk. She just, you know, well, you know how it is." MJ stepped closer. "Okay, so, basically, I didn't want to get set up by my coworkers because I was pretty sure they were just going to match me with the other black person they knew. And I was like, whatever, simple lie. I have a boyfriend. But then my supervisor was like, oh, you having someone and demonstrating that you're a person who has people will be helpful for your job. And I really like this job."

"Wow, okay." Peter was smiling. She remembered that smile. He was going to do it. He said, "Okay, fine, but since we're dating, can I call you MJ at least?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Sorry about that," MJ said. 

Peter held out his arm. She took it and he said, "Okay, girlfriend. Update me."

"On? Oh, right, my life. Um, I work at this place for the last two years. I actually got the job right after I was dumped by the girl I was formerly engaged to, it's a nice job. I have my own studio apartment in Manhattan, um, where do you live?"

"Still in Queens, actually," Peter said. 

"How long have we been dating? Since people here know you and you tend to talk about yourself," MJ said.

Peter laughed. "I'm doing you a favor," he said. He was still smiling, though. "I only know a few people, and I actually barely talk to them. Because of them, though, I keep trying to win them over. We can be dating as long as you like. Probably not too long, though, because then it's like, why haven't you mentioned me?"

"I've dated three people since I started working here, one of them for a whole year and I never mentioned any of them," MJ said. "Let's say six months, okay? I mean, for the rest truth is always good. We dated in high school, you dumped me, we reconnected. We do still have a few friends in common. Mostly Ned and Betty. But May still has me friended."

"I didn't dump you, you dumped me," Peter said. 

"Wow," MJ said. She opened the restaurant door. "Let's have this argument right now."

"It's not an argument," Peter said, softly. 

"Right now," MJ said. She squared her shoulders and took off her jacket. "Right now you should tell me what you do. What you're doing besides your other job. I know you're doing that still. Wow, and you're still alive. I didn't think that would happen back when we were in high school."

"Yeah, I'm surprised I'm still alive, too," Peter said. He grimaced. He took off his jacket and handed it to the coat check. He said, "Um. Freelance photography, like I mentioned. Live in Queens. I'm also doing some tutoring." It was a really nice suit, tailored perfectly for his overly broad shoulders. They weren't overly broad, really, he was lovely. 

"Don't you have a doctorate?" MJ was basically whispering while smiling at him. "Ned has this picture of you at your graduation."

"I do have a doctorate, I'm kinda working on getting another, but in the meantime, you know, I don't know what I want to do workwise. To integrate with the other job that hasn't killed me yet."

"Got it," MJ said. "Tutoring?"

Peter shrugged. Ugh, he looked really good, MJ noted. Peter said, "It's through the September Foundation, it's a program to help adults finish high school or college. I do science basics."

"Oh, that sounds cool," MJ said. "I was picturing rich kids."

"You were wrong," Peter said, smiling again. "You look beautiful."

"You, too," MJ said. 

They got some passed apps and talked a little more to compare stories and make them work. Peter touched her back, his fingers on her bare skin. It was a great dress. 

Lyndon came over, smiling. "Michelle, hey, is this your guy?"

"Yeah," MJ said. "This is Peter. He actually does some freelance photography for us. I didn't get him that job." She should have rehearsed. 

Peter shook Lyndon's hand and looked very attractive under the lights. Lyndon was smiling, too, which was good. Lyndon said, "Let me introduce you to some people, Michelle."

Peter said, "I'll follow you and look pretty."

MJ laughed, "Yeah, you are very pretty."

"You two are cute," Lyndon said. 

With Peter helping by being himself and explaining his tutoring work at length, MJ managed to make a somewhat decent impression, she hoped. She didn't talk about death or crime or say what she really thought about the current mayor, current governor or the former senator the head of her company loved. 

She told Peter all of that, though, as they stood in the corner. They used to do that in high school when they had parties with adults. He had his tolerant or bemused or whatever emotion he had in that smile. She thought it was a fond smile. 

There was music and he said, "Let's dance."

She said, "Okay, okay. It's not a great song." He pulled her towards the space where other people were dancing. Marco was drunkenly hanging on a much more attractive man. Maybe he was less annoying outside the office. Maybe he was just less annoying to people who weren't MJ. 

MJ sighed and leaned into Peter. He said, "You were really worried about getting set up?"

"Not super worried," MJ said. "But you know, it's never fun. Like, I'm not the only black person working there but. I know for a fact there's another black woman and her name is Veronica. She doesn't look like me at all. She's shorter than me and she's all curvy and gorgeous - "

"You're gorgeous," Peter said. 

"Thank you, but in a different way. The point is I knew when she got hired because suddenly there's all these people --"

"Calling you Veronica. And her Michelle," Peter said. He lifted his arm and spun her. 

She was reminded of why she liked Peter. He didn't argue with her or call her cynical, he just believed her. It was so nice. He spun her again. She said, "Maybe we can, do you want to get coffee or something later? You said you weren't seeing someone. So it's okay to ask, right? I'm not making someone else jealous."

Peter blinked again. He said, "Just coffee? Like hanging out?"

"We do need to settle who dumped whom," MJ said. 

"You're wrong," Peter said. "I have witnesses to my pain and suffering."

"I have witnesses," MJ said. "My dad, for one. He's a very reliable witness."

"I always believe your dad," Peter said.

Ashley came by, looking pinched. She said, "Peter, right? I remember you. From the luncheon. I didn't know you were seeing Michelle."

"Yeah," Peter said, smiling. "We used to date in high school, we reconnected, here we are."

"I didn't need the whole story," Ashley said. "I just thought it was, weren't you dating that fellow?"

MIchelle smiled. "Yes, Peter's very open. Flexible. Men can be bi."

Peter said, "It's funny, we broke up right before I ran into MJ at my friend's party." He subtly shifted so MJ was a little behind him. She remembered that gesture, too. She'd maybe been rude.

Ashley said, "Oh, okay, I was just wondering. I do like Michelle a lot, I just wanted to make sure you were treating her right." 

"Thank you," MJ said. "Sorry."

Ashley said, "My brother is bi." Then she went looking for another victim. 

MJ said, "Do you want me to set you up, like later?"

"I do fine without set ups," Peter said. He let MJ drag him back to the food tables. 

MJ said, "I feel like you don't get what it's like working in an office. Because some people are, well, there's no words."

"Bitch eating crackers, that's what the blogs say," Peter said. 

MJ laughed again. He said, "It's the official term. Very scientific. When everything someone does annoys you, even just eating crackers, that's the term. B. E. C." 

"Cause you have a PhD and I should trust you," MJ said. 

"I wrote my thesis on BEC," Peter said. He leaned closer to her. 

MJ leaned into him, their heads touching. It was really actually disturbing how easily she felt comfortable with Peter, like he hadn't dumped her and then gone on to be perfectly fine and not die being Spider-man. She said, "So, like, maybe coffee?"

"Tomorrow? Tonight?"

She grinned and stepped back. "We can go now. There's an actual diner near my place. I feel like if I stay longer, I'll screw up all the good I just did for my career."

"It's a plan."

They got their coats and took the subway. Peter sat next to her and said, "What was your plan before you saw me?"

"I didn't find anyone on the subway, so my plan was to lie. My boyfriend got sick. Or broke his ankle. One of those two. Maybe he broke his ankle because he was sick and passed out," MJ said. 

"I can't believe you couldn't find anyone on the subway to be your fake boyfriend," Peter said. 

MJ looked down at her phone, grinning. She said, "Oh no."

"What?"

MJ said, "Lyndon texted me. He wants to do brunch, fuck. You and me and Lyndon and his partner. And one of the bosses and their partner."

"I made a great impression," Peter said. "I wonder if I can get more work from being so lovable."

"You have to come," MJ said. "I'll say the wrong thing."

"I don't think you would, but I'll come. This is totally turning into a great plot," Peter said. "I can't wait to tell Ned."

"Oh, man, please don't. It's just this week," MJ said. 

Peter smiled. "You know I'm always game. But you're paying for the coffee." 

They went to the diner. Peter ordered coffee and an entire meal of cod and fries. MJ sighed and got a piece of pie. Peter dived in to his meal and said, "So, you totally dumped me. By the way."

"No," MJ said. "A week before we started college, you were in my room and literally said we should break up."

Peter shook his head. "I said we should break up?" His voice was intentionally higher and squeakier. "I was saying what you wanted me to say. Clearly."

"I didn't want you to say that," MJ said. "I was upset. I was very upset."

"You kept talking about how long distance was going to be so hard and how far away Columbia University is from Carnegie Mellon. And how talking on the phone and skype wouldn't work," Peter said. He rubbed his forehead. "You wanted to break up and you made me pull the trigger."

"That's a song. Isn't it?"

"It's a million songs," Peter said. "You're not disagreeing with me."

MJ crushed the crust of the pie with her fork. She sighed again. "Maybe. But you didn't have to do it."

"All I ever wanted was to date a girl long distance who wanted to break up with me," Peter said, smiling. "It's fine. As long as you admit I'm right and you dumped me."

MJ said, "Whatever. Sure. So you kept up the whole Spider thing."

"Yes I did," Peter said. "And didn't die. Yay me."

"Yay you," MJ said and patted his shoulder. "Got your degree and Master's and PhD. Taking pictures and tutoring adults. Dating. Some fellow six months ago."

Peter had finished his not great looking fish, and was poking at his fries. He said, "More ladies than fellows, but yes. And you. Got a degree."

"Carnegie Mellon was great. Pittsburgh is, you know, different. Glad to be back here. A series of wacky jobs and now this one. More ladies than fellows, too," MJ said. "Well, not in number, but like, length of relationship? I mean, there was Rebecca, that was two years. And Andrea, I was with her for a year. Actually, other than those two, I've dated guys, but it's never felt serious. Besides you." MJ sat back. She hated talking that much. Peter always brought that out of her. She talked too much. 

Peter let the silence sit. Then he said, "So Rebecca was a jerk. Not a jerk." He drew a circle in the air with his last french fry. 

MJ said, "It's not important. She's, you know, not an ex I'd be thrilled to see waiting outside the holiday party."

Peter said, "You weren't thrilled to see me."

"But I like you," MJ said. "I'm willing to propose a stupid romcom plot to you. I wish you well."

Peter nodded like she'd said something meaningful. She really hadn't. Rebecca was embarrassing to talk about to MJ. She felt like an idiot. 

After MJ paid, they walked outside to even more snow. "Peter," MJ said. "Just come back to my place so you don't have to deal with this. You can't exactly swing home in this weather."

"I've done it in worse," Peter said. "But okay. Is this a sleep on the couch or are you hitting on me?"

"You sound like me. The bluntness," MJ said. "I don't have a couch but I'm not hitting on you. It's a studio." She thought, briefly, if she's cleaned everything up. She didn't like to expose herself so she never brought people home. 

This was also Peter. He was always different, much to her chagrin. 

When he got in bed next to her and turned on his side away from her, she had a moment when she remembered the first time she and Peter had had sex. Her first time, his first time. He was so nervous putting the condom on, it stuck to his hand. They had to get another one out. 

She could see his pale shoulder and back in the faint glow from the lights outside the window. He actually had a scar. Peter Parker had a long jagged line from his shoulder to his spine. She wondered if it was recent, something healing slowly. She wondered if he had others. He had been Spider-man for something like twelve years. She reached out to touch him and then pulled her hand back. She turned on her side so they were back to back.

xxx

Peter woke up in MJ's bed in MJ's studio. What a night, he thought. What a weird funny night. Ironically, the first night of Hanukkah. A great miracle happened there, he thought. MJ admitted she'd dumped him. 

The room was toasty warm. Peter kept his apartment even warmer, but he wasn't paying Manhattan rent. Peter ran through the things he needed to work on that day, the next day. He had a brief idea about something for his new thesis and then a second thought about a gadget he could send to -- he opened his eyes and looked for his pants and his phone. He reached down and then started typing his notes out. 

Behind him MJ made a noise and turned on her back. "Peter," she mumbled. Then she said his name clearly. "Peter."

"Yup," he said. "Right here." He got up and went to the bathroom. He leaned out of the doorway and said, "Is it okay if I take a quick shower?"

"Yeah, go ahead," she said. 

The bathroom was like the rest of MJ's studio, unmistakably her. Peter could admit there had been a few years in his life when he saw a lot of other people's places. He'd seen a lot of other people's bathrooms specifically. Once, Peter had even joked to Ned about getting an insta just for bathroom views but Ned said the idea was gross and intrusive. Peter was pretty sure that was an exaggeration. He'd never done it, though. 

He touched the wire sculpture mounted next to the mirror. It was more of a gesture than a specific shape and it looked busy but peaceful. He wondered if MJ had made it, or she'd bought it. It was probably not something he could ask MJ without coming off as an asshole. Or coming off as a weird jerk ex-boyfriend. Maybe he could ask, this was a very odd situation. He was an ex-boyfriend, but it had been more than half a decade since they'd been together or talked. He could ask some questions. 

He lost his nerve when he got out into the studio. 

He got dressed and finally looked out the window. Even more snow. He needed to get home so he had a decent coat and boots. MJ came up behind him and looked out the window, too. Because MJ was smarter than nearly everyone, she immediately identified Peter's problem. 

"You can borrow my UGGs," she said. "You can keep them. I'm embarrassed to own them. They're not even real UGGs, they're knockoffs. They keep your feet really warm, though."

"Way more than my dress shoes," Peter said. "When's our next fake date?

"Saturday, assuming the weather cooperates. Do you, we could do something Friday if you don't already have plans. So we come across as more real," MJ said. "More relaxed together."

"Or we could do something Friday just because we like each other," Peter said. "We're hanging out, we don't hate each other. We could just hang out."

MJ was silent, and fidgeting. He knew what he thought that meant. Peter said, "Or not."

"No," MJ said. "We should hang out, just as people who like each other. It's just weird. I don't get how we just snap back to liking each other, after all these years. It's weird." She gestured widely and then crossed her arms tight across her chest. 

Peter nodded and made sure to step back so he wasn't crowding her. He said, "We didn't break up because of something bad either of us did."

"So maybe if we'd run into each other at Ned's wedding, it would have been just like this," MJ said. "I had to miss it, though. Also, I'm not a wounded fawn, you don't have to give me space."

Peter sat down next to her on her bed. "I know, I know. I'm used to working with people who have a more hair-trigger temper."

"It's nice you think of your students as people you work with," MJ said.

"No, I meant the professors at Columbia," Peter said, grinning. "Yeah, I do think of the students as people I work with."

"Okay," MJ said. She got up and rooted around in her closet. He could admit he was leering a little at her butt as she bent down. MJ was still gorgeous, more gorgeous than in high school. 

She stood up with a smile and waved the boots at him. They were bright bright blue with a little white pom pom. "I am totally going to keep those," Peter said. 

"Make sure they fit," MJ said. Thankfully they did, they were just a little big. MJ took his phone and added her number.

When Peter finally got home, he wasted no time getting his clothes off and huddling under the blankets in his very heated apartment. It was turning into a pretty average snow day but fun at least. He ran through his schedule for the next two months to make sure he'd have enough money and it still seemed okay. He opened his email and scanned his former coworkers list, he liked to check on the people he tutored. Just a check in and say hi, so people knew someone was thinking about them and rooting for them.

He also had emails to answer from his coworkers who reached out to him. They were now firmly in the friend territory. He checked in with the dean of the department where he was planning his second thesis. He needed to get details on tuition and classes the dean thought appropriate. Until then he was just taking notes before he could get in a lab and construct the main experiments. 

His next round of tutoring started on the second of January. The coordinator from the September Foundation sent over the resumes and backgrounds for his next round of students. He had seven total, he never went higher than eight. 

Peter used to go out as Spider-man on days like this, whenever he had free time. Peter was older now and he'd stopped believing everything bad that happened was his responsibility to stop. It was more like seventy five percent of everything. He laughed at his own joke, alone in his bedroom. But it wasn't everything. He couldn't do everything or be responsible for everything.

He played three video games including one where he had a tiny raccoon baby he had to nurture. He was going to raise that raccoon right so it didn't turn out to be a thief or really into guns. 

He thought about calling Ned to give him a full update on MJ, but he'd sort of promised her he wouldn't. He hadn't said anything about his other friends, though. Peter called his ex, oddly the one that Ashley had spotted him with. He thought ex was a pretty strong term for someone he'd had sex with ten times over the course of fourteen days. They were better as friends, much better as friends. Seth was great company. 

Though Seth strongly resembled a young and beefier Mahersala Ali, and the sex had been great. 

Peter called Seth, who had time to chat. 

Seth said, "You think you two gonna get back together? Because that sounds like the end of this movie."

"I don't know," Peter said. "I wouldn't object, probably. I don't know. I really haven't seen her in years. Actual years. She dumped me. She even admitted it."

"So you think she's fundamentally changed since you were both eighteen," Seth said. "Or changed enough that a relationship wouldn't work. Maybe just think of it as a new relationship prospect, not a carry over from high school."

"I think we're both rushing ahead here. She doesn't seem into the idea. She said all her committed and serious romantic relationships were with women besides me," Peter said. 

"Oh, God, I'm your token queer friend in the movie. I'm just a sounding board to move the plot along," Seth said. "I resent this. I demand to have my own narrative."

"Granted," Peter said. "Tell me all about your day."

Seth had actually had a fascinating day. Peter listened enraptured. Seth was an incredible storyteller. 

For Friday night, Peter had settled on ice skating. The snow had stopped, at least until Sunday according to the forecast. MJ agreed, reluctantly. She said, "If, and I said if we do something again, let's go for an activity you don't have a natural advantage."

"My advantage in ice skating is completely unnatural," Peter said. They were standing outside the rink, skates already on. "We aren't counting radioactive spiders as natural, are we?"

"Come on," MJ said. "Fine, I don't want you to have an advantage. I always feel so graceless."

"You're not graceless. Promise to catch you before you fall on your butt," Peter said.

"But you'll let me fall on my face," MJ said, stepping gingerly on the ice.

"I know you want to look good for brunch, so butt and face. But if you're falling on your side or shoulders, I won't intervene," Peter said. He stepped on the ice, following MJ a little behind. MJ started slowly skating with the flow of the other skaters. She was doing fine. 

She made a tiny bobble and he got right up behind her, holding her arm and hip. "No falling," he said. 

MJ swallowed and then smiled very tentatively. She said, "I was thinking, we don't need to rehash all our past relationships to pass as a couple, we need more, like, what is your thesis about? What do I say about my job? What are some couple-y things we do?"

"We go ice skating," Peter said. "We, uh, watch TV. Do you still love true crime documentaries? And I Survived? I can talk about that. Or Forensic Files."

MJ was skating with more confidence. She said, "I do, but I'd rather they not know. It's weird. They'll think I'm weird."

"No, they won't," Peter said. "True crime podcasts get, I dunno, five million downloads a week. But okay. What's your acceptable media?"

MJ made another bobble. She said, "I know these people, you don't. Think New Yorker readers, you know? And don't tell me about their great long form true crime reads, because they skip those stories."

"I don't know that long form true crime reads would be a phrase I'd use," Peter said. "So, um, food shows?"

"I actually really hate food shows," MJ said. "Right direction, though. I also like, um, Jeopardy. I like Jeopardy. And we both think Jodie Turner-Smith is gorgeous, so we go see all her movies."

"You're assuming, and you're right," Peter said. "I like to watch Star Wars, Star Trek, don't like fantasy shows. I'm sure you watch with me sometimes."

"Sure," MJ said. "Holidays, what are we doing?"

"Well, I'm still kinda Jewish so," Peter said. 

MJ said, "Which started the night of the party. I think I'd be that bitch, and give you small gifts every night."

"Not bitchy," Peter said. "So what have you been getting me?"

"Pastry, fancy coffee, graphic novels. I'm getting you something special for the last night because that's when we're going to May's," MJ said. "Isn't she out in New Jersey now? What's up with that?"

"Happy wants a house in the suburbs, so that's where they went. And yeah, last night, we'll go there and May will get out my mom's menorah and order in latkes," Peter said. "It's nice. Of course, there will already be a tree up. And if we did get back together, May would be over the moon so let's assume you'll have a stocking."

"Awww," MJ said. "My dad moved to Mississippi. He tried to explain, like, we have family there, we'll be able to visit. And I was like, it's Mississippi. There's a whole Nina Simone song about how awful that place is. He said it's changing, slowly, but changing and he likes the weather better and then he showed me how much of a house he can buy with what he paid in rent here."

"Yeah, but that big house is in Mississippi," Peter said. 

"Seriously," MJ said. "Exactly."

"But he still likes me, I bet," Peter said. "Even if you did convince him I dumped you."

"But May got me a stocking," MJ said, laughing. 

"I bet it's adorable," Peter said. "She bought it right after we were still together after Thanksgiving."

MJ stumbled on something and started to trip and fall, but Peter simply grabbed her hips and lifted her straight up. "Okay, okay, don't flail. Get your feet under you, I'm putting you down."

She held her breath but when he slowly lowered her she went right back to skating. "Okay, hero," she muttered.

"I am, thank you," he said. 

MJ relaxed a little and they skated for another half hour. Peter told her about his work, and all his free time. She said, "So you just lounge around."

"I think deeply about my second thesis. I do my other other job. I actually make some money with some R&D for Stark Industries. I visit my aunt. For the purposes of brunch tomorrow, I can hang out with my awesome girlfriend," Peter said."I play a lot of video games."

"I'm awesome," MJ said. "I don't want to give it away, but I got you a great Hanukkah gift. Like, really great." She did a slight turn and hugged him. He lifted her up again. "Also, I am done skating. Carry me to the exit."

"I am a hero," he said. 

They were walking to the subway and he said, "You know, you could see my apartment."

"You're totally hitting on me," MJ said. "I, um. Okay, let's see it. I have to leave in the morning so I can actually wear something appropriate for the big brunch."

"Good, we have a plan," he said. "I am hitting on you, by the way." Peter took her hand. She didn't squeeze his, but she didn't let go. 

They actually didn't talk until they got to his apartment. He was probably too smiley and eager. That was gross. But he wanted her. It had all just woke up in him when he saw her at the party. 

She wandered around the small ish space and looked at the things on his walls. She left her coat, gloves, scarf and knit beanie on the couch. Then she turned and said, "I know it doesn't matter for tomorrow, but. Um. How did you get that scar on your back? Is it from being Spider-man?"

Peter smiled. "No, you'd think, right? No. I was on a train going back to New York City, it derailed. Out of nowhere. I knew maybe five seconds before it happened. It wasn't enough time. I only survived because of who I am. Everyone else on the train in my car died. Even I was barely alive for a bit there. I have other scars, too, they're all healing. I think May has more trauma from it than I do."

"But still trauma for you?" MJ had a very serious gaze on him. He remembered. 

"A little. I've got a little from a lot, though," Peter said. "What happened with Rebecca?"

"Ouch," MJ said. "She dumped me for her ex. The one she dated right before me. It was nice of her to break up with me before we actually got married, I guess. I just, it really sucks to be the speed bump in someone else's love story. I'm their romantic obstacle they had to overcome. Oopsie." She scratched at the back of her neck. "Anyway. Have you ever been in love? Besides me?"

"Sure, of course." Peter grinned. "Just once though. Besides you. I was in college, undergrad. She was, it was great. I was about to tell her, you know, the big secret, but she started." Peter shook his head. "She has schizophrenia. Not an easy case. And I said, I'll support you, I'll stay with you, and she said go away. She didn't want me around. She was in a very nice hospital for a year and now she's doing great. I guess. I follow her on instagram." 

MJ smiled and stepped forward, closer to him. "You would never have left her, I know you."

"You make it sound like a fault," Peter said. 

"Sometimes, it is," MJ said. "Not always." She reached for her phone and turned on a playlist. She said, "Maybe we should talk more?"

"Definitely need a soundtrack for that," Peter said. 

MJ grabbed his hand and they started a slow kind of waltz to whatever had come up on first. It wasn't really a waltz but it was close enough. "It's Valerie June," she said. "I love this song." The floor was bare and cold. MJ had her thick socks on, she glided a little. Peter was more bouncing on the balls on his feet so they were sort of eye to eye. 

The song shifted to some kind of sad boy rock. MJ clung to him, arms around his shoulders. Peter held her waist. He flexed his hands, she was warm under her shirt. He rested his chin on her shoulder. It was indeed sad boy rock, a little bit whiny about a break up. But some of the slow notes and words were a little close to home. 

He liked dancing like this, being so close to her. She tightened her grip on him, she held the back of his head. She was somewhere between scratching and petting, both felt good. She hummed along. "I don't know this song," she said. 

"It's on your playlist," he said. 

The chorus came on with strings and more clever mopey words and she kissed him. Peter kissed her. He held her tighter. 

He guided her around in a small little circle. She let him lead. He was always equally happy to lead or be lead when dancing. 

Peter was happy, he was with MJ. The song faded out. The next song started quick and loud and with dance-y beeps. He and MJ both laughed and she started to step out of his arms. He said, "Weird segue." 

He held her tighter and lifted her up, taking her to his bed. She turned on her side to face him. She yawned. She said, "Let's sleep."

"Sleep is good," he said. 

xxx

MJ was asleep until she wasn't. She generally didn't sleep well in other people's beds and Peter's was no exception. It was a nice bed, firm but not too firm, soft sheets and sleek blanket. But the sounds were wrong because they were different. 

She felt too old to be this stupid and contemplate having sex with her ex without any talking about what it meant. Were they getting back together? Was that even an option? 

On the other hand, Peter was beautiful. She could see his other scars from the train crash, but otherwise, his body was basically ideal. He had only changed a little since high school, physically. She'd talked him into posing nude twice and even taken a pic when he was seventeen. She didn't have that picture on her phone anymore, but she really had kept it for much longer than she should have. 

He'd filled out a little. Just a little. 

On the one hand, having sex without any real talking would be stupid. On the other hand, Peter was unbelievably decent. Plus, Betty had said Peter was pretty much all about the casual sex since college. At least according to Betty who knew from Ned, so it was pretty much true facts. Apparently Peter's longest relationship since the girl he almost told he was Spider-man had been maybe three months. So if MJ was going to be stupid, Peter was perfect on every front. 

Peter mumbled and turned on his side, facing her with a sweet smile. Like MJ had been thinking so hard it woke him up. She'd believe that. Peter said, "Do you need to go home so you can get ready?"

"I have some time," MJ said.

"Oh good," Peter said. He shifted fast with all his super speed and was on top of her, holding himself up above her. "You still want to? It's okay if you say no, obviously."

"I definitely still want to," MJ said. She spread her legs to fit him better on top of her. Then she said, "Oh, fuck, wait, I need to pee."

Peter got off her just as quickly. He said, "Yeah, I should, too. You first." 

"Chivalry," MJ said. 

She peed and washed her hands. She put a little toothpaste on her finger and rubbed it on her teeth. Peter's toothbrush looked like an invention gone wrong. It probably worked great but she would never use it for the obvious hygienic reasons, and also it was scary-looking. He had a nice, clean looking bathroom. The toothbrush was the only thing that made her think Peter. Everything else was generic or probably something from May. 

She got out and Peter went in. She sat on the bed and didn't exactly fidget. She wasn't changing her mind but she was stuck in anticipation. She would have preferred to get swept up in passion to turn off her brain. She rubbed her forehead. Then she took off her shirt and underwear. Peter came out of the bathroom and stopped right at the edge of the bed. "You are, you're just so pretty."

She looked down at her crossed ankles. She said, "You're overdressed."

He was at it with his speed again, it felt like she blinked and he was gently getting on top of her and definitely naked. He kissed her and then kissed her jaw. He had the broadest shoulders and the warmest skin. She reached down and grasped his dick at the root. She said, "Are you waxing for the aesthetic or the suit?"

Peter laughed. He licked under her breast and she shivered. He said, "Honestly, both? There's this guy, this seventy year old guy from Brazil. He's very matter of fact. A friend rec'd him and now I can't stop. My regular waxing appointment."

She felt him getting harder. He touched her, finally, between her legs, spreading her open. She pressed herself into his hand. He said, "Is this okay?" She looked down and he took a little bite, like a nip. On her thigh. She felt embarrassingly wetter.

"Okay," she said less coherently. "Go ahead."

It was like a series of tiny pinches shooting electricity going up from her thighs straight to her core. He still had his damn fingers touching her, and pushing inside her. She arched her back and actually moaned."Peter," she said. 

Now his mouth was occupied between her legs and essentially fucking her with his tongue and fingers and everything built like a wave or a storm until she came. She exhaled and floated away. 

She was still shaking a little as Peter moved next to her, his head on her shoulder. He said something, she wasn't really listening. But she spread her hand on his slightly sweaty abs. 

She muttered, "Condom?"

"Got one already," he said. 

She laughed again and opened her legs. Then he was thrusting and inside of her and it was wonderful. She grabbed his neck and then said, "Still like getting your hair pulled?"

He said yes and then grunted as she did. He had a rhythm like a great funk song and he went on long enough that between the fucking and his fingers she came again. He finished before she started to feel like some damn doll he'd bought. She'd definitely dated a few guys like that, but not for long. She knew Peter was never that guy. 

Then they were both worn out and sweaty on his way nicer than she expected sheets. She said, "Where are these from?"

"Oh, a gift. The woman I broke up with before she dumped me. It was a very self-interested gift," he said. 

"It's a really nice gift," MJ said. "Any chance you were going to tell her the secret? The arachnid one?"

"Not really," Peter said. "I don't meet many people where that comes up."

"This is nuts," MJ said. "Nutty nuts."

"Ah," Peter said. "Maybe we should, I feel like this discussion is probably best for after our brunch."

MJ said, "Sometimes I hate your strategic thinking. But thank you." She rolled off the bed and went into the bathroom. Then she went to her own place. 

She showered again and did her hair. She spent more time than normal on her make up so she looked professional and quirky and valuable to the company. She'd already settled on her outfit so she put that on. MJ sat on her bed and flipped through her phone. If she and Peter had been going out for months, they probably would have talked about moving in together. He couldn't move into her place, she didn't have space for him. She was not going to move to Queens and not into Peter's apartment. They could compromise. It wasn't like she was in Pittsburgh and he was home. 

MJ looked out the window and thought. The problem with Peter was that they fit together so easily. 

When they were skating, she'd made a passing joke about him dating a student and he'd been offended. "I've never dated or tried to date a student or someone I taught. Even when I was just a TA, I don't do that." He was such a good guy. He overthought everything, he took too much responsibility for everything. The insides were the same. He was just more grown up now, he'd had a lot more sex. He looked great. 

That was the problem. Same as in high school, sort of. Now it was very in her face. Dating Peter was basically forever. Unless he dumped her, which was pretty unlikely. MJ felt too young to be about forever. 

Now she had turned into Peter and was overthinking everything. 

She didn't even really need him for this brunch. She wasn't going to get fired for not being enough of a person. She wouldn't even get a pay cut for being weird. MJ just wanted things to be easier. Or something. She had already turned into Peter, she sighed. 

Peter was dressed like himself. He had a flannel button down on with a black tee underneath and dark jeans. They wouldn't turn him away, not with that body, but she wondered if she should have asked for something a mite more chic. He was still super hot, though. She was being too self-conscious. Maybe she could stop thinking too much, but she wasn't feeling good about that either. 

They were holding hands and genuinely laughing as they sat down with the other four. It was a pretty fancy place. Peter got his coffee and picked up the porcelain cow creamer. He said, "Every time I see one of these I think of that show, Wonderfalls? I'm the only one who watched that?"

The boss's partner, named Ian, said, "I loved that show. The talking cow creamer and Lee Pace, love Lee Pace."

"He was the brother, right? Great show. I loved his other one, the one with the evil gremlins, that one? Loved that, too."

Lyndon said, "So you're both talking about the guy behind Hannibal? Pushing Daisies?"

"Never watched those two," Ian said. 

Peter said, "Pushing Daisies, I loved. Dead Like Me, also and Wonderfalls. Hannibal wasn't for me. I can't do all the blood and gore."

"Cannibalism, though," MJ said. She held his wrist and rubbed the soft skin there. She could imagine how much blood and gore he'd seen in real life. 

Peter said, "You know, one time in college, there was this plane crash." They both giggled and Ian laughed, too. 

Lyndon said, "So only me who liked Hannibal?"

MJ was willing to admit to that one. They had a good conversation. Peter made her feel at ease. He didn't think she was weird so she felt less weird. He was a jerk that way. 

They walked out together holding hands. "Hey, Peter," she said.

"Yes, MJ?"

"What do we do now?"

"We've already been ice skating, I'm really well fed. Want to make me watch Hannibal?" He grinned. 

"No, no, I meant, like, now. You knew that. After I've finished being a human for my bosses and no longer need you for that," MJ said.

Peter squeezed her hand. "You're always a human being. Some people just don't appreciate you."

"Sometimes I don't give a fuck about being known," MJ said. "It's all so much work."

Peter pulled her past the subway stop they should have taken. "Is this your argument for getting back together, so much less work?"

"No," MJ said. "No, you're a ton of work."

"Well, so're you," Peter said, still smiling. 

"But you want me," MJ said. "You so want me. You're totally into me."

Peter pulled her closer and put his arm around her waist. She liked that. She was literally feeling grouchy that she liked it, liked all of this with Peter. He said, "You're right, you're always right. I don't know. I was already in a pretty good place, honestly. Good life. Good friends. Haven't been pounded into a building or nearly flayed in a train crash for a good long time. May is happy, I'm happy. And then you come to the party and you look like a vision, like beautiful. I know Thor, you know. And somehow you're more beautiful than him." He kissed her cheek. "That night, I mean. The lighting was amazing."

"Thank you," MJ said. "It was great lighting. Very crisp night air." She guided him into one of the weird divorced white lady boutiques that had sprung up on this street. It had airy clothes and mason jars and a collection of books probably chosen for the cover and it was nothing like any part of New York City MJ actually liked. "Believe it or not, Ashley said she loves this place. She shops here constantly."

"You have a lot of feelings about Ashley," Peter said. 

"I feel like ever since college, there have been a lot of Ashleys," MJ said. "But this is the worst of Ashleys. Ashley."

Peter pointed at the display of scented candles. "That's cool."

MJ took the one labeled 'tobacco.' She sniffed it. "This is actually nice." 

Peter leaned in close to her and sniffed the candle, too. "It's very sharp," he said. "You should get it."

"Speaking of nuts," MJ said. She took one of the boxed candles. "This morning I was thinking, if we were really dating, we'd probably be talking about moving in."

"In this case, since we've not dating, haven't been dating, that would be sudden. But please when it happens, you can keep that candle for when I'm not home."

"But the smell would linger," MJ said. 

"But not as strong as when it's actually lit," Peter said. "By sharp, I meant unpleasant. To me, anyway. But not actually like tobacco."

"So we're just ignoring the whole thing about moving in together less than a week before we met for the first time in years," MJ said. "I'm not like you. I'm only in a mildly happy place. Maybe not even happy. I guess. I mean, I like my job. I have time to do some protesting. I have good friends. I can get dates if I want, I guess. I don't know. I'm, well, I'm scared."

Peter said, "We don't actually have to move in together. Though, May would be seriously thrilled if we got back together and you came over for Christmas. Or Hanukkah, actually, since that ends on Tuesday."

MJ shook her head. "You're just ready to jump right on that boat, huh?"

"Cause we have a relationship?" Peter grinned and then showed her a porcelain gravy boat shaped like an actual boat. 

"Awesome," MJ said. "You're just going with the flow, let's do it."

Peter shrugged. "It's up to you. If you wanna, let's do it, if it's wrong, we don't. I still wanna keep in touch, though, it's great seeing you."

"I hate your sunny disposition," MJ said. "I am getting this candle."

She followed him deeper into the boutique because he went that way. He looked honestly delighted by each display area. He'd been like that in high school, just more embarrassed about his enthusiasm. Peter turned and said, "These socks look incredible. Feel that."

She felt it. "So soft," she said. "I think these are actually leg warmers."

"Even better," Peter said. "It would be wrong to wear these in the suit, right?"

She had to laugh. "Doesn't the suit have a heater?"

"Sure, but these would look cute," Peter said. 

"And then they get shredded the next time you get dragged on your butt by a car," MJ said. 

"Good," Peter said. "Good point."

He looked at the minimalist picture frames, he poked at some "winter" balms and actually picked up a knit beanie. "Wait, maybe I can find a Hanukkah gift for you to give May."

"I can make something for her," MJ said. "Ugh, are you trying to trick me into agreeing into this?"

"I'm not trying to trick you," Peter said. "Whatever happens, we can keep hanging out, right?"

MJ said, "Right, right. Okay. I am willing to commit to Tuesday with May. But don't tell her we got back together. We're just hanging out."

"Just hanging out, works for me," Peter said. "But the sex was pretty good, right?"

"Yeah, we're definitely doing that again," MJ said. She bought her candle and Peter bought his beanie. 

Sunday MJ lounged in her bed and flipped through her old old notebooks from high school. She had so many sketches of Peter. She spread them on her bed and got out a new notebook. She did a few new ones while she watched five eps of I Survived she'd seen a million times before. 

Hanging out to Peter clearly meant she was now on his texting list. He sent three different memes over the course of an hour. She tried to be annoyed but they were all so funny. Jerk, she thought. 

Monday night she made two little ornaments with wire and canvas for May and Happy. She called Ned and didn't mention anything about Peter. It was such a weird phone call. She didn't want to say anything about Peter and he was all she was thinking about. Ned finally said, "MJ, why are you being so weird?"

"Stupid Peter," she said. 

"Oh, yeah, he mentioned you're coming tomorrow for Hanukkah latkes. That's so cool," Ned said. "I'm glad you two started hanging out again."

"Is that really what he said?"

On the screen, Ned squinted at her. "Yeah, that's exactly what he said. What's he leaving out?"

MJ decided the fake dating was too embarrassing to ever admit. She went with "We kinda hooked up. Just once. I don't know, it was all too easy. It was like being back in high school, but minus all the teen drama."

"Yeah, that sounds awful, I can tell by your expression you're super upset," Ned said. He grinned. "I don't know, maybe Rebecca was your oopsie. That's reason enough to get back with Peter. I can rub it in her face, if you want."

"Ned, I think you're more upset with her than I am," MJ said. "I appreciate that."

"You were really heartbroken," Ned said. "I hate people who do that to my friends."

"But what the fuck, right? Something's wrong if you can just hang out with someone after years and years and it's all good," MJ said. She looked at her nails, she'd actually gotten them done after work. With a menorah. She'd told the nail tech it was for some guy she was dating. She'd maybe bragged a little about how good the sex was. After the nail tech asked. 

"Well, you guys weren't not talking because you didn't like each other. Or you did each other dirty," Ned said. "It was distance and going to college." 

"I know," MJ said. "I know. I've totally forgotten all the obnoxious things about Peter."

"He's almost always late," Ned said. "He skips things constantly and when you call him on it, you feel like an asshole because he was probably saving someone's life. He thinks nearly everything is his fault, like he's the center of the universe but he would never admit how arrogant that really is. He always plays off his hurt like it's nothing and he'll always pick the option that hurts him most. He's so scatterbrained."

"Glad I could help you get that off your chest," MJ said, laughing. "Also, why is he always so fidgety? I remember that part."

"See? He's human. I mean, he's also great. As you know." Ned turned his head away from the screen. "Hey, Betty, MJ and Peter had great sex apparently."

MJ heard Betty saying, "Good for them. Honey, get off the phone, I need your help on this cake."

Ned said his goodbyes and so did MJ. 

Like she expected, the next morning Betty texted her frantically, as she'd finally processed what Ned had said. Betty texted "tell me now or I'll bug you about it in front of May."

MJ sent an eyeroll gif, one of the amazing ones from the latest season of Real Housewives of New York. She texted "you know the details we ran into each other went ice skating back to his place sex happened the end"

Betty texted "you two should get back together"

Then she sent something like fifteen memes to really emphasize her point. 

MJ warned her she better behave when MJ arrived in New Jersey that night.

She also texted Peter to make sure they had their stories straight. They were just hanging out. Ned and Betty knew they'd had sex. That was all. 

As soon as MJ walked in the door, she was getting hugged by May Parker who hadn't changed at all. She even got a kiss on the cheek. "Now, I know you're doing okay because I still have you friended, but it's so nice to see you in person." 

"You, too," MJ said. She handed over her wrapped gifts and requested a hot drink. Happy nodded and nearly smiled at her. She appreciated his understatement. 

It was nice, it was fun. MJ was once again appalled at how easily she fit back in with May and Peter and Happy. There should be more friction, she thought. She had changed and grown. It was wrong these people liked her so much. She made a grumpy face just as Peter passed by and he leaned in and booped her nose. He even said, "Boop."

She said, "You're irritating. You're so irritating."

Peter leaned in even closer and she could smell the hint of alcohol from his eggnog on his breath. He said, "I accept you're saying you really really like me."

xxx

Peter was smashed into a building and then fell six stories. It was unbelievably painful. He'd broken a few ribs for sure. He could stand, though, and he did. He even finished and won that fight. He alternated between the excruciating pain of swinging and some less painful but still ouchy running until he was home. He patched himself up in the living room of his apartment, sitting on the floor. Once he had his ribs wrapped and all the blood and bruises cleaned up, he got on his bed. He managed to pull the bright yellow faux fur throw Betty had got him over his aching body. He flailed a little and got his phone. "Hey, hey, MJ," he croaked. "Let's do dinner tomorrow."

"You sound awful," she said. "What's wrong?"

"Injured. I'll be better tomorrow for us to have dinner. Come by my apartment and we'll order in."

"Okay," she said. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's a plan." He hung up and closed his eyes, immediately falling asleep. 

She came by earlier than he expected, like she'd run out of her office as soon as she got off and headed to Queens. She had a bag of something under her arms. She put the bag down and said, "You're not dead. Yay. Ned was right."

"Ned was right?" Peter hadn't talked to him all day. He'd slept in and had just showered an hour before MJ showed up. 

"He mentioned some things, some negative qualities of yours," she said. 

Peter smiled and opened the bag. It was Chinese takeout. "He was right. But see, nowadays, as an adult, I have a plan. Whenever I'm really injured, I make plans with someone for the next day."

"So you won't try to go out like this?" She grabbed the bag and gently guided him to the couch. Then she opened the boxes and started jabbing at the food with her cheap wood chopsticks. She held up a chunk of fried tofu and something green. She said, "Ugh, eat this."

He took the food from her chopsticks but got out his own chopsticks, too. He opened the other box. "Oh, noodles," he said. "Garlic noodles. Thank you."

"Am I just here for you to verify you're alive?"

"No, I make plans so I won't even try to go out and so I have a reason to get up," Peter said. "It's good strategy. I know my weaknesses and I work around them."

"You could try to change your bad habits," MJ said. She took some of his noodles.

"It's really hard to change your fundamental nature," Peter said. "For better or for worse."

"Does that mean we're doomed?" She glanced at him and away. He handed her the remote and she turned on his TV. 

"No, we fundamentally got along great. We broke up because of distance and being teenagers who wanted to find our way, and now we're adults and we've found our way and we live in the same city. Maybe someday we'll try living in the same borough," Peter said. He shifted so his ribs weren't aching. 

"Hmm," MJ said.

They watched MJ's choice of crime shows, including the first few episodes of a docuseries on a cult. It freaked Peter out a little bit, but it was compelling and not gory. Peter just had to close his eyes and he could relive all the blood and gore from his train crash, or that one time in Staten Island, or any of his other awful, disgusting adventures. He was starting to get sleepy, too. 

"You must be injured if your body's working so hard to heal," MJ said. "Come on, get up, you should sleep in your bed." 

Peter stood up and shook his head. "I'm going to the bathroom first, check the bandages."

She followed him in and did it for him. Then she ducked out while he peed. He was definitely going slow as he went to his bedroom. Once he got in bed, MJ tucked the covers around him. He said, "You can stay. I saw you brought a bag."

She grimaced. "Okay, fine. Fine."

She wedged herself in around him. He said, "Sleep tight."

They didn't have sex in the morning, or a few days later when he came to her apartment to 'pay her back' with Thai food, or whatever excuse he'd made up. But he texted her to invite her to Christmas at his place, or actually May's place back in New Jersey. 

MJ had plans for every night leading up to Christmas, but so did Peter. "Yeah, we're both so popular," MJ said, rolling her eyes as they met up to get to New Jersey. 

"Oh, hey, Merry Christmas," Peter said.

"Thanks," MJ said. "Merry day hanging out with people who celebrate Christmas."

May had made a stocking for MJ since she was coming, and there were cookies and chocolates in there. MJ had brought wine and chocolates so it was all very sweet. Peter said that out loud and only Happy laughed. Some people didn't have much of a holiday spirit. 

May had even made a vegetarian ham following some kind of recipe she found on the internet. Surprising everyone, MJ said it wasn't that bad. Then it was time for movies - May insisted on Home Alone and MJ brought in a serious dark horse, Meet Me In St. Louis. "It's pretty dark. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas is from this movie, and Judy Garland sings it, and it will make you cry," MJ said, getting on the couch next to Peter. 

"After Home Alone, then," May said. 

After a big late lunch and the crash after chocolate and Home Alone, May and Happy were starting to fall asleep halfway through Meet Me In St. Louis. They both roused themselves sometime before the end, and since MJ was already asleep herself, said good night to both of them. May said, "Don't let her go home. Maybe ever." Then she winked. 

Peter said he loved her and rolled his eyes. 

MJ woke up right before the end. She insisted Peter go back to where she fell asleep. "So I can watch it twice? Okay," Peter said. "I'm happy to."

"You're really not," MJ said. 

It wasn't that long, so he watched it with her, arm around her. When it was done, Peter made sure the dishes were done and everything was cleaned up. He turned and MJ was just standing by the couch. She said, "I guess I should stay."

"Yup," Peter said. "There's no guest room, well, the only guest room is my room for when I visit. So. There's a pretty comfy couch in there. If you want."

"No, you sleep on the couch, I'll take the bed," she said. 

"Works for me," he said.

"Dumbass, of course we're both taking the bed. See you in there." 

When he got to his bedroom, she was sitting in the middle of the bed. She was fiddling with some old webshooters Peter was sure he'd left in a drawer in this room. That had been a stupid idea, he should keep all his old equipment with him, but he'd been working on them here at May's. She said, "Close your eyes."

He did, automatically, and said, "What are you doing? You have to be careful with those --" He heard the whoosh of them being used. He opened his eyes and looked at MJ, grinning. "What?"

"Look up," she said, actually giggling. 

"Is that, did you web mistletoe over the bed?" He laughed a little. "Is that a sign, MJ?"

"Yes, God, get in this bed and kiss me, and also, maybe, we should keep doing that. All of that for however long," MJ said. She opened her arms. "If you want."

"Yes, yes, yes," Peter said. He jumped a little to get on the bed and kiss her. 

She said, "Did you tell May about the silly fake dating?"

"Oh," Peter said, taking off his shirt and pajama pants. "No, I only told Seth, my friend Seth and he said I couldn't tell him any more about it because he didn't want to be the token queer in our romcom holiday movie."

"Token queer? I was engaged to a woman, and you, I'm sure you met Seth by having sex with him," MJ said, straightening her back. 

"We didn't meet while having sex, but we did have sex the same night we met in a bar. We had sex in the bathroom. Something that bathroom had seen a lot of, frankly," Peter said. 

"You got around," MJ said. "Don't do that while you're with me."

"I won't," Peter said. He kissed her, cradling her jaw in his hands. "Never ever."

"Maybe we'll save the full story for our anniversary or something," MJ said.

They didn't. By their first anniversary ("I should have waited until after midnight. What an awful anniversary, Christmas day. Ugh, I'm so sorry," MJ kept saying), they were living in their new apartment in Manhattan and honestly too busy with Ned and Betty's new little one to remember they meant to tell this really funny story. Then MJ got pregnant and after careful consideration it felt like a good time and why not so she was just cranky and thirty nine weeks along and they didn't even leave their apartment. They didn't even get married until their baby girl was eight months old. 

MJ had switched jobs by then, too, and she wasn't still friends with Ashley as an example. She started a side business selling her own art while taking care of baby number one, pregnant with baby number two. Peter actually shouldered more of the parenting labor since he had more time and was happy to do it. 

So really, they had forgotten that everyone didn't already know the story when Peter told it for the first time at their fifth anniversary at May and Happy's and he was telling Betty like she already knew while tracking baby number two very carefully since baby boy ran everywhere. Betty said, "What?" and everyone was listening and MJ said, "I know, it's so silly. Didn't we tell you already? That was a job, huh?"


End file.
